Approaching 2000 Approaches
I started doing Daygame seriously in August 2017. Today, I’m at 1956 approaches. I keep an open What’sApp chat with Nash and record almost all of my approaches there. A few times a month I enter the stats in Excel. I consider it an approach if I am able to open my mouth and she hears it, I include all my blowouts, conversations with girls who have boyfriends, leads (phone, instagram, fb, linkedin, business cards, WeChat, line, whatever) etc.
In nearly 2000 approaches, I have gotten 128 leads, and gone on over 50 dates, kissed a few dozen, and seduced 4 wonderful girls – 2 of whom I am in occasional contact with, and one of whom has flown from Europe at her own expense to visit me and is likely to do so again.
Some people may think I’m a bum for only seducing 4 girls after 2000 approaches, and they are welcome to think so. But before you judge me so harshly, have a look at my progression and the lessons learned:
All my approaches. Note there is an uptick in the slope in June 2018 and another in November 2018.
These were numbers and leads, the first year was slow going. I was running out of things to say after approaching, not stacking, ejecting early from sets, suffering from a weaker frame. July 2018 and January 2019 are the major inflection points.
Again, I experienced some beginners luck in Sept 2017, but I was also approaching much lower quantities. July 2018 was where I started to do enough volume.
For the last 4 months, I’ve had about a 10% chance of getting a lead from an approach. I have about a 40% chance of getting a date from a lead. And about a 10% chance of seduction from there. For those who can’t do the math that suggests 0.4% or 4 seductions per 1000 approaches. My real stats are at 4 per 2000. Hmm. First two seductions came at around 370 and 540 approaches, 3rd at 1100 and 4th at around 1800. That 1100-1800 gap was 700 approaches. Did I mention it was winter? Doesn’t matter, I feel like I’m on the cusp of taking off.
So one big observation I want to share is the work rate. How many girls do you need to approach to get better? There are guys out there who say you should just do 1 approach a day. While that’s better than nothing, I don’t think it’s enough. I think the answer is 5, and here is my data to back that up:
There is an inflection point in July 2018, after 11 months, once I started to do over 70 approaches a month (2-3/day on average) and a second inflection point in November 2018 when I started to consistently do 130-150 per month (4-5/day on average).
I feel like I wasted my first year of daygame by not approaching enough. I was dating the two girls I met and seduced – taking a K-selected approach, so that did cut into my approaching. I was also amused that this daygame stuff actually worked, and that I was getting good enough to do it consistently.
Also, around July 2018 I sorted out my fashion. I found some looks that really worked for me, both summer and winter looks. That improved my confidence and the responses and I was energized to approach more. Fitness wasn’t an issue for me and I’m neither tall nor short, but style can always be improved.
Also, since November, I’ve only had 3 consecutive days of not approaching. One was Dec 23-25 and one was when I was visiting a relative who lives in a city where the daygame sucks. Because of this consistency, I really don’t have much approach anxiety and the momentum is just constant.
My prescription for doing daygame and getting decent is going out almost every day and working up to an average of 4-5 approaches per day. I have primarily run daygame in NYC so I can’t comment on if that amount of volume is possible in other cities in the world, but I imagine London, Tokyo and a few others might work.
Also worth mentioning that I met one of my regular wings on the street, he approached a girl I was about to approach, and we became friends and daygame regularly. Nash also introduced me to Magnum and to the world via Anonymous Twitter, which has also provided some interesting contacts including Roy Walker, Thomas Crown, and Mr V. Special thanks to my wings and to Nick Krauser for writing those fantastic books, particularly Daygame Infinite and Daygame Mastery.
In July 2018 and especially since November 2018, I’ve noticed that I’ve been very happy with the quality of girls I have been meeting and dating: models, actresses, tourists, artists, musicians, dancers, doctors, accountants, students, interns and a few shop girls. I’ve been attracted to all of them and really enjoyed my dates with each one. I have no fear of missing out – the money I spend to live in New York is being well spent.
In February, I began to have problems with too many leads, too many dates to try and schedule at the same time (a problem that continues to this day), and my dates were inconsistent. I talked to Magnum about his two date model and watched a Tom Torero video and those helped streamline some bad habits that had formed from my previous escapades with night game and Tinder ( I deleted Tinder in May 2017 and never looked back). I’ve also been focusing on improving my texting and escalating on dates. It’s working. I expect my yield will go up.
My answer is 5. Do an average of 5 approaches to day to learn this stuff. Your solution might be different. Get out there and approach. Girls like champions, and champions don’t make excuses.